Long live memories of my Milo!

May 13, 2012

Carmel Beach 2010: My birthday picnic.

Oh Milo, how I will dearly miss you. My very first post on this blog was about you, being a carefree dog, letting your ears flap in the wind as we finished our adventures in the midwest and embarked on a new adventure in California.

2002: Rather unexpectedly I had the chance to bring you into my life, and I’m so glad I did. I picked you up as the snow began to fall, and the next morning, eager to explore your new surroundings, you took me skiing in my sneakers across the ice and snow behind the first KC apartment we shared. (more…)


Milo Contemplates Buddha

May 31, 2011

Milo Contemplates Buddha

For the first time in a while, I’m feeling right. Not sick. Not anxious. No belly full of butterflies, nausea in the pit of my stomach, afraid something is bad, bad wrong. I can’t put my finger on why exactly I was feeling that way, but that feeling has overtaken me for months, paralyzing me. Maybe it was just a string of random events, maybe it was just the winter doldrums. Does it really matter? I now feel like I can breathe, like there’s fresh ideas that might spring forth. When I look over and see Milo contemplating the Buddha, I can just laugh, feeling light and free and happy.


Life continues @ warp speed

November 16, 2009
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And my brain continues at a snail’s pace.

My past week+ has been taken up with a nervous stomach over Milo, and the ups and downs a parent might feel. First, worried about his surgery (torn ACL). Followed by happy that he was coming home. Followed by worry that he was too excited, followed by extreme worry that he wasn’t moving, followed by feeling helpless and sleeping in his bed with him because he was upset and crying, and I couldn’t figure out what was wrong. This was followed by feelings of “did I do the right thing?” over the surgery; is he eating enough; is he eating too little? How much pain killer do I give him? Do I need to sedate him at night? Is it really okay if I leave his cone off? Is he using that leg too much? Too little? Will removing his staples tomorrow be painful? How will he react going back to the vet? Should I go to D.C. for Thanksgiving? What if something happens?????

Brain at a snail’s pace, unless it is thinking about Milo. Then it is flying at light speed, along with my heart, my breath. I know it will all turn out fine, but I can’t stop the anxiety.


in other news…

April 10, 2007

Milo’s cone is off! The ear seems to have healed nicely. He also finally got a bath, so he’s no longer King of Funk, though I think he kinda enjoyed that title.


Smile – I am

March 21, 2007

Reading my friend Pappy’s site today made me think of thoughts I had a while back. It also made me get off my ass and go for a walk, which Milo enjoyed greatly.

I’m not sure if I’m just on Cloud 9 lately, or if I’m just trying to focus on the good things, and not the stress and worry of the future, the past, the what ifs, etc. It’s not a concious focus, so maybe I’m just slowly, slowly learning to relax.

As I was walking Milo the other morning, the bees were buzzing, it was pleasantly warm, the sun was shining, the flowers on the bushes were blooming. I smiled. As I smiled, and side-stepped the snail, I started making a list in my head of all the things that make me smile, and make my worries melt away.

When I stepped out today, and saw the leaves above, I decided when I got back in, whether or not I had the time, I would at least sit down and put some of my thoughts down in writing…

Things that Make me Smile

  • Colors in nature – especially when they match the vibrant outfit I’m wearing
  • The sun warming the crown of my head
  • The smell of flowers blooming on the first day of spring
  • Milo’s prance
  • Nin ordering me a birthday present off the internet (and it getting here!)
  • The smell of Indian food on my right hand
  • Raju laughing at my loving his Mom’s mango pickle
  • Raju’s mom taking the time to show me how to make her mango pickle
  • The brilliant blue of the sky
  • The slightly damp air on a warm morning
  • The pomeranian on the trail with it’s butt shaved (actually, this one made me laugh)
  • The twinkle in Raju’s eye when he laughs at a little kid running
  • Being moved to create something
  • My Dad’s hug
  • Lounging outside while typing this list, or enjoying a glass of wine in my little outdoor sanctuary in the evening

  • The sparkle of my engagement ring in the sun
  • The first time I start up the grill when the weather warms
  • Having good friends and the most wonderful family
  • Cupcakes, with or without sprinkles
  • Getting flowers
  • Raju’s hand gently rubbing mine
  • Memories
  • Water
  • Knowing I will see Mom soon
  • My dried herb garden
  • My live roses
  • California Poppies
  • Wearing a sarong
  • Palm trees
  • Milo’s smile 🙂